Tag: healing

Seasons

Seasons come and seasons go. None stay for long. Each with its enchanting beauty or with its nightmarish toil. There was a time I had no concept of seasons. I’m sure I was taught about them in school, but I guess it wasn’t important enough for me to pay attention. The weather was either hot or cold, with nothing in between. I recall first being aware that “there was” different seasons, and that there was a “time” of the year in which they took place. I was mesmerized by this new found “lost” information. Why hadn’t anyone ever told me about them? Ha! Well, they had I was just not paying attention.

As life has continued, I’ve become “aware” of seasons in life. However, some life-seasons are as “predictable” as weather-seasons. Some life-seasons can linger far too long, while one aches under its oppressive load. Others, one wishes they had never ended…they were far too short.

Take winter for example. Some places have the beauty of snow, which makes for a winter wonderland. It’s what you see on post cards, on romantic movies. Those beautiful white Christmases. But what about when you are shoveling snow? Frost bite? Wet and frozen toes? Blizzards? You get my point. It also makes “everything” green die all around.

I live in California, so I am not in the midst of snow and such. But I remember a winter that lingered way too long. We had fruit trees in our back yard. Those trees ended up looking like horrid “bushes of dead sticks”. I was so over it. The sight was not one I was fond of looking at every day. I was ready to yank everything out and “start over”. Maybe it’s the “controlling person” in me or the “fixer”, but something had to be done. The gift of “waiting” was definitely not mine. My husband convinced me to wait, which was no easy task.

Come Spring, I was mesmerized by the beauty of “regrowth”. Each bud, each shoot, each sign of “new life” was breath taking. I was grateful I waiting, although not very patiently.

TODAY I’m up to my neck, and at times completely submerged in “snow”. I have “no-shovel”, and even if I had one, I have no strength to “shovel-myself-out”. My winter-season is brutal and frigid. And, at times it feels like it will last forever. However, TODAY, I am reminded of those horrid-dead-bushes in my old backyard. AND…I have HOPE!

~~~ Spring always follows Winter ~~~

“There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens” ~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

My Beginning

“We all begin and end in darkness – the womb and the grave. We’re here to find and share as much light as we can in between the darkness.” ~ Naomi Esther

My Beginning ~~~

Born on April 1966, in Acatic, Jalisco, Mexico, at home. Pregnancy #15 out of 16, most died of childhood diseases or miscarriages. Seven of us made it to adulthood. Of those seven, two have died, one has been missing since 2009. I am the youngest of them all.

A lifetime of experiences which have left scars and wounds. Passionate about going from victim, not just to “survivor”, but to VICTOR. Learning that life is NOT a sprint, but a long and arduous walk along a road that has twists and bends and highs and lows and ups and downs. Accepting those “extreme lows and down” times.

“Our experiences are seeds: they are useless unless planted and our redemption is what grows from them.” ~ Naomi Esther

Each scar has a story. Learning be fearless about speaking “it” out loud. Learning to remember, without getting stuck in the past. Learning to live in the present, and trusting my tomorrows to the One who is already there.

“Scars – I suppose I love my scars because they have stayed with me longer than most people have.” ~ Nikita Gill

THANK YOU to all the follows and the likes. Grateful to share this life journey with you all. Grab some water…the journey continues ❤

 

Blissfully Lost

Las dos amigas out for a time of pampering. The plan was set, the guys would eat and watch the soccer game while the girls get a day of rest, relaxation and pampering. Kiss, kiss and off they went.

The taxi driver didn’t seem to be “in service”, but then again everything moves slowly in La Paz. I guess that’s why one gets away. He finally agreed to shuttle them to their destination. Girls talk and talk, and giggle ready for their pampering. The driver, on the other hand, seems lost. He asked, one too many times, “What does your phone say?” to which the reply was always, “we have no WiFi”. Finally, at their destination!

The “look” of said oasis promised much. As they walked in they were greeted with sour looks. So much for “walk ins welcomed”. Icily turned away, “no room in the in”. A ray of hope rose in the horizon as one of the clients showed the discouraged amigas another location, AND it happened to be “right around the corner” (hold that thought). Off they went, with their plan “still” in place…pampering!

Blocks, and blocks, and blocks they walked…umm, “are we there yet?” There it is! Yes! The sign on the door shattered their plans, once again, “we’ve moved to a new location…” Taking this as a “sign from above”, they decided to head back to meet back with the guys.

Lost, yup, they were so lost. Walking, walking…hey, so I guess they did get a massage – of their feet…haha!

A wonderful little boy showed them the way. Yes, they are finally at the malecon (walk way by the beach). From here they can find their way “home”.

~~Blissfully lost, not a care in the world. The company of a caring and loving friend made all the difference. The talk was deep and fun. There were tears and much laughter. Somehow, I wish we were still lost…blissfully lost!~~

Fisted Hands

Hands closed…tight, tight! Veins pop, the flow of “life” is cut off. Holding on for dear life, thinking, “if I squeeze tighter ‘nothing’ will be lost; nothing will ooze away.” It has been said, “he who dies with the most toys wins”. Grab, grab, grab…holding tight, oh so tight. Eventually, there is no room for “more”.

This could be said of possessions, but what about relationships? People come into our lives for a “moment” in time. Nothing and no one stays forever. My parents, both gone. My sister, my brother – gone! Friends whom I thought would be around forever, gone! Some have physically moved away, others relationally, while others have completely been severed.

There was a time I thought that by holding on tightly I could protect, shield, keep forever. That’s not how it was meant to be…acceptance is a journey worth taking.

Learning to be present, in the moment, because “tomorrow” will bring its own or it will never come. Today is a gift! This moment is a gift! Drink deeply of the moments gifted to you. Keep your hand open, your heart open…love, live, laugh!

The Impact of Words

“I’m so proud of you!” Wait, did you just say that to me? I must have heard wrong. You don’t mean it. You’re just saying that…and on and on and on.

Used to having every word and decision questioned, positive feedback is hard to accept. I remember once I was asked to handle a task. I asked for all the requirements and such. The person giving me the lead said, “You got this! I know you can handle this. I trust you.” I almost fell off my seat. In fact, I myself questioned “my every decision”, so afraid of making a mistake. Once the task was finished, I remember thinking, “I did it! And, it went really well.” I was so surprised.

Words can build or tear down!  Words can wound or heal! They can be said to me or I can say them to others.

Let me be slow to speak and quick to listen. Quick to give positive feedback, and slow, or better yet keep my mouth shut when tempted to criticize or tear down.