Author: readypen8

Writing to heal, healing to write.

Not A Robot

Because life is real and things happen…today I will deviate from my six word story post.

Also, you know those boxes one is asked to fill out to prove that you are “not a robot”? Well, this is my take on “showing” you that I am not a robot 😉

Part of my self-care includes going to the gym (I think you’ve gathered that by now). Depending on how my body is behaving, I will do what I can, always changing and modifying routines. Now with the added emotional turmoil, I go as early as I can to “avoid” a crowd and all the issues that come with it. HOWEVER, I’m finding that doesn’t always do the trick. Let me take you on a tour of some of the things that, well, just get me…grrrrrrr!

  • An empty locker room. I pick my locker in a corner. Someone, invariably, will come and take the locker RIGHT NEXT to mine! Did I say it’s an empty locker room?! The choices are endless. Oh, and she gets upset because I am in “her space” (where’s the angry emoji?).
  • An empty bathroom with two aisles of empty stalls. I go in AND you guessed it, someone just came in to the stall RIGHT NEXT to mine! Why?! Why?!
  • The yoga room. It’s empty because the classes are held during the day. I place my mat, take off my shoes, sit…yes! Breath…slow down…breath…NO!!!!!! Someone comes in and decides they will do kung-fu-fighting (just kidding, not sure what he is doing). His jumping, kicking, grunting, throwing a ball at the wall, more grunting. “Ummmm, did he not read the sign on the door?” Goodness!
  • The pool. I’m alone. I’m floating. Relaxing. Stretching. “Yes, this is good!” SPLASH!!! “What was that?” Oh, it’s a swimmer on “speed”. He stops and proceeds to do a “Tarzan scream” (don’t know how else to describe it). “What in the world is he doing?”

Just to clarify, this was not all in one day, and I have more, but I’ll stop for now cause I’m getting anxious just typing this 😀

3am workouts don’t seem to be avoiding the “people issues”…maybe a midnight workout, hummm…maybe? or maybe if I was a real “robot”?

Am I alone in this? Do you have “people issues”?

Shattered Routine

It was a “normal” day. Routine was in full swing. Time for dinner was soon approaching. I busied myself preparing and putting the final touches on dinner. My girl was upstairs in her room not feeling well. Checking on her periodically, something just didn’t feel right. My entire being filled with an uneasiness…call it mother’s intuition, I don’t know.

“We need to go back to the doctor,” I said. She asked for us to wait. So many things scared her or made her uneasy. Doctors were on her list.

Dinner almost ready. Final touches…I hear steps coming down the stairs. Her posture, her complexion, her tears…not good!

“I need to take you to the ER.” She said, “ok.” My stomach sank further. My body began to shake. “She said ‘yes’, this is not good”, was my thought. “Maybe it’s just a virus,” I calmed myself.

We entered that place where our lives would for ever change. The smells, the sounds, the faces. The face of a innocent little girl, pale, sweaty, scared. As a Mom, I so wanted to shield her from all of this, BUT I could not! My heart ached!

I held her, touched her, smiled and remained “steady”, calm and collected. I needed to! She looked to me to be her strength and assurance. I looked to Him. There was no other way.

Tests, needles, exams —– screams! Those screams! All I could do was hold my girl ever so tightly…BUT I could not stop them from “hurting her”. Oh, the nightmares…the agony!

More and more tests, exams, needles…the night passed.

Faces, nods, grim prognosis, papers…the feeling of sinking sand taking you under with a violent pull that can’t be stopped. You grasp, but there is nothing to grasp. Yet somehow, you know there is a Presence holding you tight.

The room! The test! The confirmation!

The looks…the news!

COLORECTAL CANCER

The weight of the world fell on us! Breath was sucked from our lungs! Yet, we were held by the One who holds the power of life and death in His hands.

July 16, 2016 – a date etched sharply on my heart.

Pajamas

The following is based on real events. The identity of the participants has been changed to protect their privacy…just kidding, I don’t know them or their names. It just sounded like a good opening.

Pajamas! Yup, pjs. I’ve gotten used to seeing people wearing pajama bottoms everywhere. NOT! Who am I kidding, I still do a double take when I see someone at the grocery store, at the mall, on the street…wearing their pajama bottoms as if it’s the latest fashion. In fact, I saw this young lady with full on flannel pajamas, along with her dragging blanket, grocery shopping. Oh yes, let’s not forget the fluffy slippers.

I thought I had seen it all. But, I was wrong…oh, so wrong!

Back at the gym. Getting my old bones working and my crackling body flexible enough to keep going. I glance over to the stair-master AND…pause for dramatic music — yes folks, pajama bottoms! I am not even kidding you. An older man sweating away in dark blue, pinstriped, flannel pj bottoms. To my delight, he was wearing a regular white t-shirt. So not all was lost. I shook my head and made my way to the sauna…remember the The Sauna

Out from the steam room steps a petite older woman in…wait for it……ummmmm……I’m having difficulty writing this (not really…hehe!) — she is wearing a skimpy nighty! I guess the matching chonies made it ok, maybe even fashionable.

I think I’ll just head home…

What will we find, next time, at the gym?